


A Love To Call My Own

by ifigo



Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: (as per usual), But a Decision to Propose, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Not Beta Read, Overtly Tolerant Henry, Overworked Alex, featuring Alex's anxious tendencies, me? channeling school stress into Alex? never, not a proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:08:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27680516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifigo/pseuds/ifigo
Summary: If he was being honest, Alex knew his real life was beginning to take a hit, although he would never admit it aloud to anyone. Sometimes, he wanted it to stop. He knew he was the only one with the power to stop himself from working until the sun came up and he missed every chance of sleep. But he couldn’t. And he was tired.Then, there was Henry.-	-	-Alex reevaluates his life choices before making a brand new one.
Relationships: Alex Claremont-Diaz/Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor
Comments: 10
Kudos: 134





	A Love To Call My Own

His tendency to willingly overwork himself began, like most fundamental truths in Alex’s life, at the house back home in Austin. In high school, when the divorce was still settling in and June had just moved across town to UT, Alex threw himself wildly into work - academics, athletics, debate, you name it - if it was remotely in his grasp, he dove towards it with feverish intensity. At the time his workaholic tendencies were met with praise, all the effort and extracurriculars paying off when his parents smiled and called him great. He didn’t sleep much in high school and had a hard time sleeping when he did manage to put his head on a pillow - June was worried about him, and his few friends were annoyed, but Alex bushed it all off, promising that he’d slow down after graduation. One presidential campaign and only three academically critical articles later, four years of going a million miles an hour culminated in Alex’s acceptance to Georgetown. 

But then his mom won the election, and it just wasn’t on-brand for the universally appealing golden boy first son to _not_ get perfect grades and attendance, now was it? So he kept up the same routine, taking his freshman fall off to focus on the campaign before throwing himself into so many classes that even the most tolerant advisors raised judgemental eyebrows, replacing lacrosse games and debate tournaments with official first family duties and international events, graduating in seven semesters instead of eight, seemingly taking it all in stride. At the end of three and a half more grueling years, Alex shifted his attention to the next item on the list: Congress by thirty. He hopped on his mom’s reelection campaign, putting to good use his experience on Luna’s campaign and his hours haunting the offices of the most influential people in the free world. 

But then, there was Henry. Honest, gorgeous, kind, smartass, incredibly out of left field, not on any of Alex’s lists for the future, Henry, with his soft blue eyes and stupid fucking mouth - knocking Alex’s world off-center in the best possible way. So, yeah, Congress kind of went out the window faster than Alex was comfortable admitting. But he still was going to put his strangely specific knowledge of the backways of government and willingness to fight anything that moves to use for the common good, dammit. Which led directly to the conclusion Alex probably would have seen coming years prior if he had any ability to chill in the slightest: law school. 

Alex knew, somewhere deep in him, between where he knew he wanted to marry Henry and where he knew he wanted to make a positive difference in the world that, intuitively, law school was a great idea. Clearly the logical course of action, the path that would lead him to succeed. And, truthfully, Alex loved what he was learning and doing. He loved slaving over old case briefings and foreign policy reviews for hours on end, writing about flawed districting and unlawful voting requirements and all the other injustices that had driven him wild for years in the White House and on his mom’s reelection campaign. And the best part: he was good at it. 

So good, in fact, that he had a hard time pulling himself away from school, feeling compelled to perfect a paper or prepare a presentation instead of, well, really anything else. Sometimes, he wanted it to stop. He knew only he had the power to stop himself from working until the sun came up and he missed every chance of sleep. But he couldn’t. And he was tired. 

If he was being honest, Alex knew his real life was beginning to take a hit, although he would never admit it aloud to anyone. June was practically losing her shit half the time, knowing Alex was like this, again, especially since he was in New York now and she was living with Nora in DC, unable to force-fed him or bodily remove him from his desk. That task was instead, left up to Henry. Henry, who Alex was honestly half-surprised was still in the country - he may have signed up for Alex, but Alex had not expected that Henry, even with all of his wonderful bullshit tolerance, would put up with the true pain in the ass that is Law Student Alex Claremont-Diaz for more than a week. 

It had been two months. 

And thus, here he was at half-past two on a Monday morning, stacks of notes strewn in haphazard piles across his lamp-lit desk and the surrounding floorboards, his third pot of coffee long-past empty, the essay on the glowing screen in front of him only half complete, and, well, Alex was beginning to regret his decision to go to law school. 

Alex is broken out of his paper-writing and self-pity trance by the sound of bare feet pattering on the hardwood. He stops typing, but keeps his attention on his laptop. “Henry, are you being creepy on purpose?” 

“Always,” Henry yawns from behind him, padding the rest of the way over to the desk, slowly reaching out and spinning Alex’s office chair so they face each other. “Come to bed?”

Alex loves looking at Henry, any time any place any reason, dressed to the nines, or dressed in nothing at all. But this Henry, with his fleece pajama pants and heathered shirt and ruffled sandy hair all dimly-lit and gorgeous, was truly a sight to behold. Every time Alex saw him like this - so vulnerable, so un-princely yet unafraid - he fell in love a tiny bit more. He wasn’t sure loving Henry any more was possible, but this was the only topic on which he was always happy to be proven wrong. He just wished Henry was actually asleep right now, like he so clearly had just been, instead of downstairs looking after Alex like he wasn’t a grown adult himself. Alas. 

“Soon, sweetheart. I need to get like three more paragraphs in, then I’m golden.” Alex says, gently reaching for Henry, his body betraying the part of his brain that _needs_ to keep working. It was a mistake - as soon as he made contact, Henry manifested way more strength than anyone should have before the sun rises, grabbing Alex’s hands and pulling him up out of the chair and into a hug. Who was Alex to complain about an unscheduled hug, honestly? So domestic. Giving in, Alex lay his head in the crook of Henry’s neck, reveling in the scent of him - still all earl grey and grass and lemon and something simply _Henry_ , even a thousand miles removed from Kensington. Alex was once again struck by what himself from a few years ago would have thought of him now. He found himself doing that a lot lately. 

“It’s half two, and you’ve got class at nine,” Henry shifted, tilting to rest his head against Alex’s. “We also both know that paper isn’t due for another week and you’re overworking yourself because you don’t seem to know how else to exist.”

Goddammit. “But-”

“Alexander.”

Alex closes his eyes. “Alright,” he sighs, half asleep on Henry’s shoulder. Maybe those paragraphs weren’t going to get written after all. “You win tonight.”

He feels Henry’s lopsided smile more than he sees it as he blindly reaches back to the desk and clicks the laptop shut, leaving the pair standing in a circle of notes, moonlight washing over them. 

\- - -

Alex clicked off his lamp and pulled the blanket up, nestling in to face Henry through the few inches of darkness. A car drove by outside, interrupting the rain. “Why do you put up with me doing all this, anyway?” The fact that no one else ever has goes unspoken. 

“Hmm?” Henry hums, the side of his face pressed into the pillow.

“The late nights that turn into early mornings - having to drag me from my desk every other night this week just so I get some actual rest,” Alex admits. Alex knows Henry hates sleeping alone, they both do, yet they’ve spent so many evenings this semester apart, with Henry getting to bed at an almost-decent hour while Alex works away. They’re finally waking up in the same time zone, the same damn bed, damn near every single morning, but sometimes Henry still felt so far away, and Alex knew it was his fault. He felt terrible, really, that he couldn’t seem to be a law student and a present boyfriend at the same time. He couldn’t get the balance right. 

Henry opens his eyes, the full force of his soft gaze in the night in _their_ bedroom hitting Alex like a ton of bricks, pulling him to the present. “Remember when I was finishing the draft?” Alex remembers Henry’s novel, of course, but his addled brain can’t quite keep up with where Henry was going with his, “You cut off my caffeine intake and convinced me not to quit when my computer crashed and I lost the first half. Now it’s my turn to do the same. But in my case, that means forcing you to bed and occasionally hiding your textbooks,” he sighs lightly, slowly getting lost to sleep, “The way I see it, love is a bunch of give and take.” 

_Oh_. And here Alex was, falling a little bit more in love than he ever thought possible, feeling more loved than he ever thought he would deserve to feel, all over again. His traitorous mind grabbed the statement and ran - _I don’t deserve you, do I love you enough, do I make you feel like this too, I can’t believe I’m lucky enough to get to be the man you’ve chosen to hold you, marry me_ \- before settling on, “Pretty sure that’s a Phil Collins song, sweetheart.” 

“Hush,” Henry scoffs into his pillow, none the wiser to the flurry of thoughts rustling through Alex’s head, “And I’m almost sure the song was originally by The Supremes.”

Alex laughs as he nuzzles into Henry’s chest, hours of tension easing out piece by piece. He’ll put off thinking for later. “Thank you. For everything. For you.” 

Henry sighs, pressing a kiss into Alex’s hairline, “I love you too.”

Alex would start to figure out complicated stuff in the morning for all he intended to do, like what exactly ought to be signed, and how to go about hiding a ring from a very neat man. But for now, they rested, just as they did every night these days - two parentheses, less than a pillow apart.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I've published in.....four years? Five? 
> 
> Anyways, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated! Thank you for making it to the notes!


End file.
